My baby

Fur baby that is. Look what Sara got me for being in her wedding! And we've already decided that our dogs will be best friends. I haven't named her yet, and she just got back from being spayed so I can't play with her, but she's the cutest little lump of fur I've ever seen! Thank you Sara!!!

All my ex's...

All my ex's live in Texas? Nope, but these two do.

OK, so the rugged man toy is no more. Yup. You heard it. He decided that we were detrimental to each other, or at least that's my short version of it. After him being back in the country for 2 weeks he has decided that there's no way we could possibly have a good relationship, but he wants to be my friend.

In other news along the lines of break-ups, guess which ex is getting married? Oh, the picture gave it away? Well then yes, you guessed it. At least it isn't to Easy E, who, if you search on The Knot, has a wedding website with a certain panty-sniffer for their wedding this Saturday. Just more signs that life is beautiful.

Ways I've been far from cool this week

1) Being dramatic I attempted to “just leave,” and couldn’t figure out how to open the door. I had to go back and ask how to unlock it.
2) At the gym I dropped my Ipod (it’s a wee little shuffle) and then I tried to jump over it on the treadmill and it flew off somewhere. I had to crawl around on the floor looking for it under the row of treadmills. The “outfit” it had on was black which hid it well in the dark under the treadmills so it took me a while to find it.
3) I fart in my sleep. There I said it. Yes, I know I do it but really I can’t help it – it just happens. It’s so not hot. Lucky you my man-toy - your dog and your girl fart in their sleep.

Proof I have Alzheimer's

I found this list below at this website, and I think I pretty much have all of these.

The seven warning signs of Alzheimer's disease are:
1. Asking the same question over and over again.
Yup, I do this all the time.
2. Repeating the same story, word for word, again and again.
Do this one too.
3. Forgetting how to cook, or how to make repairs, or how to play cards - activities that were previously done with ease and regularity.
I always forget how to play cards, and cooking... maybe it's not forgetting as much as never really knowing.
4. Losing one's ability to pay bills or balance one's checkbook.
OK, I didn't lose the ability, I just forget sometimes.
5. Getting lost in familiar surroundings, or misplacing household objects.
Barbara can tell you that I do this - I'm driving and I'm suddenly like "where are we?" and we're on Parmer or something.
6. Neglecting to bathe, or wearing the same clothes over and over again, while insisting that they have taken a bath or that their clothes are still clean.
OK, I don't insist my clothes are clean if they aren't, but sometimes I neglect to bathe.
7. Relying on someone else, such as a spouse, to make decisions or answer questions they previously would have handled themselves.
Hmm...I think I do this one too a lot.

It's the End of the World as We Know It

Everyone has lost their minds. Why do I say that? Well, first of all, the storm has obviously turned and isn’t supposed to go through Austin at all. Yet, at work today we were sent an email that it was mandatory to back up all files to the server by the end of the day, which is actually why I have time to write this because I’m waiting for files to transfer. It’s an estimated time of 40 minutes for ONE project folder. We had to pick up emergency contact information cards. The business continuity plan is being passed out in case of disaster. Since when has a little rain scared anyone in Texas? I mean, we all suck at driving in the rain here in Austin, but it isn’t like our building is going to be driving anywhere. I appreciate that they want everything to be taken care of, but I think they’re scaring people. Melissa just heard one of the designers say she was scared because she doesn’t have any water. I mean, come on people, freeze some water – if the water stops working you’ll have some fresh cold water. Or fill up your kool-aide jugs with water. Barbara and I decided to go the opposite way and stock up on alcohol, but it was only because the water was all gone of course – by like 7pm last night when we went to the store and we just thought it was funny. We tried going to HEB for some food and the lines were backed up down the aisles. I was trying to get gas and had to go to 4 gas stations before I found one that wasn’t packed. People were actually waiting in lines at Randall’s for $2.50/gallon gas with the Remarkable Card discount. By paying $2.59 I spent $1.17 more and didn’t risk being labeled INSANE! The hysteria makes me nervous. I want everyone to take a deep breath when they leave work Friday and say, “See you Monday” and know it will be true. Because it is.

Boy Toy B-Day

It's my rugged man toy's birthday - everyone think happy birthday thoughts and hope that the cake I baked him doesn't give him food poisoning. It's angel food cake and I think I mixed the egg whites for like an hour to make them fluffy or whatever the heck they were. I think really that I only start dating people when their birthdays are less than a month away. It's like a challenge to myself to figure out what I'm supposed to do. Too bad this isn't like college where you could give a guy a bottle of Makers and they'd think you were the coolest girlfriend ever.

A Conversation with Nanny

OK, so... today I talked to my mom and my grandmother was there. My mom put my grandma on the phone and this is how it went

Nanny "so what are you doing?"
Me "I just got back from picking up some food"
Nanny "Oh, what were you doing in Florida?"
Me "No, I went and got some FOOD"
Nanny "You got some food in Florida?"
Me "No, I went to a restaurant in town and got a sandwich"
Nanny "Oh. So did I hear your mom say you were dating someone? I wondered if you had a boyfriend right now."
Me "umm... yeah, I'm dating someone, his name is Jason"
Nanny "Oh, is he the one that was at your moms wedding?"
Me "No Nanny, that was Bryan* but we don't date anymore"
Nanny "Oh, is he coming for your birthday?"
Me "No, I don't think he's ready for you just yet"

But really, is anyone ready for my grandmother?

*as a footnote, my grandmother met Bryan many many times - I dated him for almost a year. There's no way she wouldn't have known who he was at my mom's wedding. But apparently she doesn't remember any of that. I could probably convince her that I've been dating the same person for the last 5 years and she'd have no clue it wasn't true, but that's a little mean.

A Meow Meow Birthday Surprise

So my birthday went pretty perfectly. We didn't have to have a department b'day lunch at work with corny jokes by our manager and long, awkward silences. Instead, Steph and Nicole took me out and spoiled me with presents. I got to meet up later with all the people I hold near and dear to my heart and have drinks and laugh and enojoy each other's company. And best of all, my mom's getting healthier and on the road to recovery. What more could a girl ask for?
Well, I put in a request to Andy for a "birthday surprise." I left it at that, and I was pleasantly surprised. Say hello to Henrietta Pussycat (a live kitty, not above photo). Those of you who know Daniel Tiger may or may not realize that I got his name from Mr. Rogers and the Neighborhood of Makebelieve. So, I knew my next cat would have to be Henrietta Pussycat, who hails from the same 'hood as Daniel. So, here they are and when the real kitty comes out from under the bed I'll snap a real photo of our new little pride and joy.

24 Years of Melissa!

Today is Melissa's birthday, and I thought I'd write a wee tribute to her. I met Melissa in college, and she was my little sister in ADPi. We didn't know each other well when we became sisters, but I can honestly now say that she is like family to me. I don't know what her parents did to make her the way she is, but she is one of the most beautiful people I know, inside and out. We've done a lot of growing up together, even if the growing we did was after we were unleashed on the world. I see her every day and there is never anything that makes me wish it were otherwise. Seeing everything Melissa has done, and listening to all her plans for the future make me proud to have her as a friend. I could never completely put into words how great of a person she is, but I can say that she is the kind of friend a friend wants to have, and that's something a lot of people don't ever achieve. So, everyone drink to Melissa today and send her a little happy birthday thought. Happy Birthday my wee one!

The solution - a husband

So I got AAA to jump my car today and I took it to NTB (National Tire and Battery for those of you who don't know). The guy brought me a piece that they broke off and told me that two parts had fused together because of the corrosion and it broke off. Oh, oops. Anyhow, the guy was trying to tell me how to avoid corrosion and then he was like "Or just find yourself a good husband." OHHHHH, ok, that would be what I need. Well, first of all kind sir, it's not like anyone has offered, and second of all, it's not like I'm trying to find a not good husband and the thought of finding a "good" one is new. It's not like an Easter egg hunt. Did someone leave me a good husband somewhere and I have to find him? My birthday is coming up. And I know a lot of guys who know nothing at all about cars. Even less than I do. And on top of that, wouldn't they be out of business if people didn't come in to get their batteries fixed? They'd be NT. I thought it was funny, because I just take things good naturedly, but still... a good husband is the solution to all my car problems? We'll see. Some day.

I wished it would die so it did

The other day I was at Quizno's and the lady told me she'd give me a free sandwich for my car. I was really tempted to accept, but I didn't. Well I should have, because today I went to my car and it won't start. I had AAA jump it and then I turned it off after the guy was gone and it won't start again. I know I've said I wish it would die, but really... come on. So, just another battle with this thing. If you can figure out how to start it, please just steal it. sigh...

Back to the Important Stuff

First of all, I got packages from UPS 2 days in a row. Today the UPS man looked at me like I was insane. I promised him that this was the last one. I'm sure he hates our 3 flights of stairs - he looked hot. Temperature hot. Not "be my baby daddy" hot. Anyhow, today the box was from Fred Flare, one of my new favorite online stores. Me and Melissa ordered some stuff from there. I love the store, but my warning to you is that some things are definitely larger than they appear. Like the earrings. And sunglasses. Who knows what else. The lesson I learned is to read descriptions more carefully and look at all the pictures. They did send a free gift though - a little animal key chain purse thing. How thoughtful. I like a nice little gift for no reason. This Fred Flare guy has his act together.

Anyhow, what I really meant to write about was Halloween. We must continue the costume conversation from a few days ago. I am posting the photo of the Strawberry Shortcake costume I'm leaning towards. Tell me what you think. Is it too slutberry shortcake? And Sara - I like the Jem idea. Misty, definitely think original Daisy Duke. And Barbara, we're all going old school so that makes me want to say Wonder Woman for you. But, of course you'd look hot in anything. OK, so.. continue on with Halloween ideas. We all know it's the best holiday of the year. I have the jack-o-lantern of wood on my desk already to prove it.

Everyone's done lost their minds

Of course everyone has heard that they're trying to put some refugees on cruise ships, but I think it's funny because my designer who is supposed to be on vacation this week, had to delay her cruise by a month because FEMA hijacked her ship. Of course, they get a $100 discount and $200's worth of free drinks, plus it's for a good cause, so she's getting a good deal. It's still just funny.

And I'm sure everyone has heard a lot of dumb quotes on Katrina lately. I discussed this tonight with my roomies. I propose though that there be a real-life debate between grandma Bush and Kanye West. Or maybe a death match. It seems that both of them have sort of lost their minds. It could be fun to watch. I think grandma b has definitely crossed the line. Kanye just could have done his in a different place. I love him - I have his cd and all, still a little crazy. See below.

Grandma Bush on September 5th "What I'm hearing which is sort of scary is that they all want to stay in Texas. Everybody is so overwhelmed by the hospitality. And so many of the people in the arena here, you know, were underprivileged anyway so this (chuckle) – this is working very well for them."
I found this on a website of stupid Katrina quotes.

Kanye West on I think September 3rd on a live NBC fundraiser says this instead of reading the prompter "I hate the way they portray us in the media. You see a black family, it says, "They're looting." You see a white family, it says, "They're looking for food." And, you know, it's been five days [waiting for federal help] because most of the people are black. And even for me to complain about it, I would be a hypocrite because I've tried to turn away from the TV because it's too hard to watch. I've even been shopping before even giving a donation, so now I'm calling my business manager right now to see what is the biggest amount I can give, and just to imagine if I was down there, and those are my people down there. So anybody out there that wants to do anything that we can help -- with the way America is set up to help the poor, the black people, the less well-off, as slow as possible. I mean, the Red Cross is doing everything they can. We already realize a lot of people that could help are at war right now, fighting another way -- and they've given them permission to go down and shoot us!

(West throws back to Myers, who is looking like a guy who stopped on the tarmac to tie his shoe and got hit in the back with the 8:30 to La Guardia.)

Myers: And subtle, but in many ways even more profoundly devastating, is the lasting damage to the survivors' will to rebuild and remain in the area. The destruction of the spirit of the people of southern Louisiana and Mississippi may end up being the most tragic loss of all.

(And, because Myers is apparently as dumb as his Alfalfa hair, he throws it back to West.)

West: George Bush doesn't care about black people!" I found this in an article from the Washinton Post

My thoughts on New Orleans

“Give me your tired, your poor,
Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free,
The wretched refuse of your teeming shore.
Send these, the homeless, tempest-tossed to me.
I lift my lamp beside the golden door”

Were they just BSing when they came up with that? Or does it not apply if you're already a citizen? Really, I’m picturing the end of the new Batman when I hear about what’s going on in New Orleans. I think all my friends have pretty much said most of what there is to be said about it on their blogs. I’ve been to New Orleans twice this summer, so this hurricane destruction there makes me picture some of the people I’ve met – I thought I’d list them here just so everyone can picture some real people, and keep them in their thoughts. If there’s anyone you can think of, add them on in the comments.

1st Trip – Memorial Day weekend
The pirate at the Absinth bar
The pizza chef from the photo - which is my only recollection of that night
The old guy that gave the haunted New Orleans tour
The guy who gave us the swamp tour
The lady at the hotel who gave me a safety pin
The jazz band from my first trip – the clarinet player I loved and the drummer that made funny faces
The street magician
All the women that said they liked my dress, even after I spilt food all over it
The man who kissed my foot
The guy with the trained dogs
The lady who came through the street magicians show with a trash can – hilarious
The man at the coffee shop/ bar on Julia street

2nd Trip – August 5-7
The Godfather of Jackson Square
The artist in the square that explained the birthday dollar thing
The lady at Lush that started the birthday dollar thing
The funny bartender at the mechanical bull bar
The beotch’s at the front desk of the Queen and Crescent, and the cool bell guy
Bently (was his real name Tom?)
The kids in the street that we untangled beads for
The lady at the pizza place that wanted new boobs
The waitress at Emeril’s NOLA who called us rock stars
The lady at NOLA that gave Ebony the black napkin
The lady and the guy who put up with us in the bus stop while it rained
The bartender at Pat O’Briens who let us behind the bar
The doormen at Pat O’s that gave Eb birthday kisses
The guy Barbara tipped $5 to take a picture of us with the Huge Ass Beers To Go sign
The trolley driver who didn’t say the stops, and the one who did
The travel center lady who didn’t tell us the cemeteries were closed

Argh

An older guy in my office had eye surgery about a month ago, and now has an eye patch. On our welcome poster that has everyone's photo and names they colored a patch in over his eye, and above his cube today I saw a sign that said "Beware Pirates" - hilarious. I love people with a sense of humor! For those of you who don't know, International Talk Like a Pirate Day is September 19th, and it is celebrated in our office by one of my favorite editors. She gives you candy for saying a pirate phrase.

Also, we just had happy hour at Johnny Carinos. Anyone that doesn't already know that this is the best restaurant in the world - it is. I love that place. Their happy hour is awesome too.

And watch tomorrow for my hurricane Katrina post (Barbara, Misty and Rachel have already posted theirs).